Monday, November 12, 2012

Dream: Loosing a tooth

Last night, I had the classic dream of losing a tooth.  In this dream, I scratched a back molar with my finger nail and a  chunk of it flaked off.  Then, I fiddled with it some more and it cracked and then, I pulled it out.  The tooth in my hand was about six inches long.  The roots on the tooth looked like legs and it was a perfect ivory sculpture of an elephant, although cracked and chipped.  On the broken ends of the roots, I could see nerves hanging out of only two ends which made me think that half of the tooth was dead but that it was not totally dead when I pulled it.

Interpretation?  My take based on classical dream symbols... teeth falling out could be either insecurity or new beginnings.  But since this is not a baby tooth and was damaged, I think insecurity perhaps is more fitting.  Elephants typically represent success in one's career.  But, since this elephant was damaged and came from my lost tooth, I am thinking that the dream may mean that I am overwhelmed with my career.  What was once my wonderful career success, my beautiful elephant, is starting to crumble.  I pulled the damaged tooth myself which means perhaps it is coming close to time for me to move on to a new way of making a living.

Friday, November 9, 2012

Meeting Timothy Leary

I have always  been very interested in religion.  I read the Christian Bible from cover to cover when I was about ten years old.  then, in middle school, I decided to read the Koran... Anything that millions of people believe is worth reading whether or not you believe it.  And then in high school, I started reading about other religions.  I read everything that I could get my hands on, from the Tao Te Ching to Hinduism to Buddhism.  When I was a senior n high school, I started reading about shamanism.  And with shamanism came an interest, purely academic at the time, in altered states of consciousness.  just after graduating from high school, many of my friends began experimenting with LSD.  Being the geek that I Am, I didn't want To try it until I had a chance to study it.  So for a couple of months, I was the baby sitter, shofarring my friends around while they tripped and I didn't.  My research, mostly reading, surfaced many mixed messages on psychedelics.  Most of the propaganda against it seemed sensationalized and lacking scientific merit,  I read some books by Dr. Timothy Leary and Richard Alpert, who is now called Baba Ram Das.  But, these were academic books from the library, not the hippy dippy crap that they are more famous for.  I very confused about the safety of the substance.  That summer, the summer of 1992, I was fortunate enough to meet Timothy Leary. We were both staying at the Atlanta Hilton Towers.  He was supposed to there to do a virtual reality simulato  of some sort.  The first day that we met, he seemed to be very intelligent.  And, he had an air about him, a certain charisma that was appealing even those who hate what he represents.  I thought to myself that this man has done more LSD than just about any person alive and he still has his shit together.  He is still smart ans his brain is not fried.  Meeting him gave me the confidence to take the leap and do acid for the first time.  I can't help but wonder just how many lives have changed by coming into contact win Mr. Leary.  I will admit, I was an impressionable  kid at the time.  Looking back, I don't think he was as cool as I had thought at the time.  The reason that I say this is that on day number two, I bumped into Tim a couple of times.  At one point, he tried to read poetry but was too fucked o to read it properly.  Another time, my friends and I got our picture taken with him and a woman who I think was his daughter.  Tim's arm was around my shoulder in the picture.  Then, we all got on an elevator together.  A couple of floors up, two  young teenage girls got on the elevator.  They were tripping but had absolutely no idea who Timothy Leary was.  As the elevator rose, the girls looked a little scared  by the movement.  And, Tim said to the girls, "what would happen if the cables holding this elevator would snap right now?". He delighted in freaking them out.  Looking back on this, I am very disappointed in Tim.  I am amazed that he would fuck with them at a vulnerable moment like that.  At the time, I was young and naive.  I thought it was funny.  But now, after many years of acid experiments, I simply find it hard to believe that Tm would have sunk so low as to play this sort of mind game with these girls on acid.  I now have mixed thoughts about Mr. Leary.  In some ways, he was a marvelous doctor and neuro naut.  He broke new ground and was responsible for much of the mind expansion taking place in the sixties and seventies.  But he also sensationalized LSD and I wonder if he is In part responsible for anti drug paranoia and the harsh drug laws that exist to this day.

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Acting Out Our Dreams

The other day, I was pondering if acting our my dreams might prove insightful.  I'm not talking about acting out my desires, but rather to try to allow the night's dreams to give direction to the following day.  So, today will be my first trial run.

Dream #1:
This dream was vague.  All I can recall is that I was wearing a T-shirt that had a picture of Bill Cosby.

Actions Per Dream #1:
I don't own a Bill Cosby T-Shirt, but I do have a Fat Albert shirt.  It has pictures of Fat Albert, Mush Mouth, and Rudy.  Since Bill Cosby created Fat Albert and did the voices, I am now wearing my Fat Albert T-Shirt.

Dream #2:
I was at C. Anna G's House with a large group of people including my wife.  C. Anna G is somewhat of a Shaman who lives near Athens Georgia.  She is a spiritual leader in her community, hosts moon lodges, and has spiritual workshops for those seeking for a peak into the spiritual realm.  At C. Anna G's house, about 20 people had gathered for a role playing game.  Masks and dice were passed out.  About this time, I heard that it was C. Anna G's birthday.  My wife came in and placed my checkbook on the table and said that she'd loaned some money to one of the other guests so that he could give C. Anna G. a present.  I asked if she'd recorded it in the checkbook log.  She said no.  I handed her the book and told her to write it down.  She wrote in it and placed the checkbook back on the table. I looked at it and found that she'd written the guy's name and not the amount.  I asked how much and she told me $100.  I was furious as the guy she'd "loaned" the money to was a young hippy kid with bleach blond hair who obviously couldn't repay it.  And, we lived 2 states away so the chances were nil that I'd ever see my money back.  I went over to the kid and whispered to him that he could pay me the $100 later this week or just give me $80 in marijuana as it'd been so many years since I'd gotten high.  Hi nodded knowingly and I expected him to pay me in this way.  Then, another member of the party asked me to come outside with him.  We walked over the hill and found the field behind the house to be filled with creators/pits.  I jumped down into one of the big ones (about 10 feet across and six feet deep).  In it was a rustic chair carved out of a single piece of oak.  It sat next to a simple desk on which were displayed many intriguing items carved out of bone or ivory.  First, I saw the masks carved out of bone.  The man with me pointed out the growth plate lines and said that he thought the masks might be carved out of real human skulls that the kid had dug up (aha!  That's what the pits are from).  The other items were mostly old buildings and houses carved out of bone.  At least one item we were pretty sure was carved out of turtle bones.  I commented that the items were absolutely beautiful but that they could never be legally sold being that they were carved out of ivory and bones.  But, I wanted one and was hoping that the hippy boy artist could repay me by giving me a piece of art or at least counting the $100 toward my purchasing one for more money.

Actions Per Dream #2:
I live too far to visit C. Anna G. but may e-mail her about the dream.  I don't have friends who role play, so that is out.  I think that I'll go to a flea market or antique mall to seek out something made of ivory or bone.   And, I'll try not to second guess people that I see no matter how simple they appear.

I'm not at all sure what to think of this dream.  I think that it may have something to do with my stinginess with money.  Perhaps I should not have been angry with my wife for giving money to this young man and for guessing too quickly that he'd be unable to repay me.  But, I also have to wonder about the "treasures" that he made some of which were made out of other people's bones.  And, what's with the masks?  Are we all hiding who we really are?  To me, C. Anna G. represents seeing beyond the mundane physical world and delving into the mysterious subconscious spiritual world which is the foundation for our waking world.  So, maybe I should try to look beyond everyone's "ego" mask and find the true persons within.  That even the most naive carefree person could present treasures.... but why are those treasures still dependent on the bones of others before him?  I'll have to ponder this dream a while.  Maybe today's search will shed some light on things?